Do Utah Men Who Go To Church Refuse To Do Household Chores?
When it comes to housework, mopping the floors, washing the dishes, and doing the laundry, do religious men do less? Does a more traditional view of families mean a greater division of labor? If you live in Utah and want a more balanced household, is it better to find a progressive man among all the religious folk?
The answer, according to research at the University of Utah, is surprising. It’s exactly the opposite. A study was done that showed religious men were far more likely to participate in household chores than those who did not profess a belief in God.
They noted that one would assume religious men would be more misogynistic and hold to more traditional roles for men and women, but what they found was those who attend religious services see their role as believers is to help others and this includes their spouse. The division of labor is much more equal with men who are looking to serve others.
This wasn’t surprising to some of the men they interviewed including a Jewish rabbi and an Evangelical Christian. Both described how they saw their duties around the house as a reflection of their dedication to God. By helping around the house, they feel they are living a higher calling then just fulfilling their own needs.
I know in my own case, I see my marriage as a partnership and try to do my part, though my wife has banned me from doing laundry, and for good reason. I just feel you could get it done a lot faster if you don’t worry about all the separating into colors and fabrics. I do my share of folding and hanging after it’s all done.
So, there you have it. If you want your man to do more around the house, according to this research, maybe get him to go to church.
Don't Suck So Much At Gift Giving...
It's coming...one of those special days on the calendar you must buy a gift for your significant other. You’ve blocked these events from your mind because you hate the pressure of getting a good gift. It takes a lot of work to find something for someone else and you know you aren’t good at it. You scan websites that proclaim to have great ideas for the day, but they are of no help. Finally, you grab something that looks like a good gift to you and throw it in one of those decorated bags with the sinking feeling you have failed again.
Some people are better gift givers than others. What are the characteristics that make some people better at it? Is it impossible for us more selfish types to ever do it right?
You can actually become a good gift giver and it’s not as hard as you think. The first step is to rid your mind of any ulterior motives.
Am I cheap? Do I feel like this day was set up by commercial entities to get us to buy more crap? Am I thinking of things I would want? Am I thinking of something I feel the person should need? Am I just going through the motions?
If you go in thinking these things, it will earn you an eye roll when you present your gift, because your motivations shine through. If you can separate these underlying beliefs and think clearly about the person and what they enjoy, the things that matter to them, you have a much better chance of landing on something they will truly appreciate.
One time I got my wife a plant for Mother’s Day. She appreciated it because she is a good person, but she knew I was motivated to get something living because flowers die in a few days. I couldn’t stand the thought of spending good money on something so transient. My cheapness undermined the gift.
One time I got my wife a window washing set with squeegee, hose and special cleaner. I would not recommend this gift for most people, however, my wife loves to have her windows clean and I promised to use the kit and do it every month. It was a gift she appreciated because there was no underlying agenda from me.
You really can become a better gift giver by putting some thought into it. Mainly, by realizing it’s not about you...like really...forget yourself for a minute.
Ike, here at the radio station, is getting his wife $50 in small bills. She loves garage sales and there’s a neighborhood up North who will be having some great ones over the weekend. With his gift she can spend the morning cruising around looking for deals. That’s a thoughtful gift.